Sharon Henson - My Story

by Sharon Henson
(Springfield, Oregon)

I was the recent victim of a online dating scam. You can find my story here - Steve Vig, Oil Rig Engineer. I shared my story not only in hope of helping others be aware of the dangers of online dating but also, just a little bit, in hopes of finding out who the man in the pictures really is.

I posted his pictures on this site, on Facebook, on a few postings on Craigslist and one other scammer site in hopes that someone may recognize him and contact me. He has many distinctive tattoos on his arms and I was so sure someone would know him. I wanted to contact him to make him aware that his image was being used in these scams, and that is true, I do want him to know this but I also just want to know him.

I know others think that you can't love someone that you never met, someone that you have only seen in pictures but I do love him. I want to know him, I want to love him, I want him to know me and love me back. That would happen in a perfect world, or my idea of a perfect world but in reality, and I have to live in reality, I don't know him.

I don't know anything about him. I know that in the pictures I was sent, he is not wearing a wedding ring in any that his left hand is visible but that doesn't mean that he isn't married or have a significant other. I was being selfish in wanting to find him. I was thinking of myself and not how this might affect his life. I can't be the one who causes him, or those in his life, any pain or problems because of what happened to me. He had nothing to do with what happened to me, and he shouldn't have to suffer any consequences because of it.

I wanted to make something positive out of this devastating experience and I thought making him aware that this is happening to him was a way to do that, but it could cause more problems for him than I really thought about. This experience has hurt me in so many ways but that was not any of his doing. I can't be happy knowing that I have done something to cause him any pain.

I do love him, in a way that I can't expect others to understand. I need to put this awful, painful, life shattering experience behind me and move on. I can't let my scammers win and they would be winning if I just stopped living and waited for a handsome, nameless man to come find me. I have to believe that there is someone out there for me to love and who will love me back. They will not take that away from me, they will not win.

They may have knocked me down but I will get back up and move on. I am not a very religious person but I believe in God. I am putting this in his hands. If He wants me to know this man, and I am hoping He does, then someday maybe our paths will cross. Until then, I will continue to live my life and hope that love will find me again. I will be more cautious and less trusting, at first, but I will never give up on trying to find my happy ever after, the man I am supposed to spend the rest of my life with.

No scammer is going to take that away from me ever again. I pray that the man in the pictures is healthy, happy, and safe somewhere in this big world. I have to believe that he is. I will make it though this. To everyone, men or women, who are going through this right now - please know that you are not alone. There are so many of us going through the same thing.

Find comfort in this, there are others out there that know what you are feeling and they understand. Find them, talk to them, start a friendship. It has been so helpful to me to have someone to listen to me and let me cry and just say all I need to say and not judge me in anyway because they have been through it, they understand.

I wish you all the best.

Be strong, you will make it through.